Healthcanc

Every day, if we stay awake, we learn lessons in all kinds of ways. As in, people are people, no matter where we meet them. But if it feels like a duck. . .Not that people are ducks, but their behaviors can be predictable if you trust your instincts about them. Ebay, like most other websites,  lets users know what’s going on with their sales by email. It can be annoying, but constant notices are one way to inform sellers and buyers about inquiries, things that might matter or not, and possible fraud.  When my father passed away a few years ago, he left me a few things that weren't worth all that much. Out out of respect, because he was a business man and he liked to make deals, I made a few myself, sold a few of the items left over from his gift shop on Ebay, that flea market in the sky. It was great fun, in its way, taking pics of the merchandise,  listing items to sell,   packaging and mailing them off. I got pretty good at it and met a bunch of people. Almost ever...

It isn't everyday that Amazon makes you feel your opinion matters. Well, actually it is. Yesterday's reach out was about a pilot for a new show, Jill Soloway's Transparent . I think because I watched three and a half seasons of past Parenthood within six months, the robots assumed I would like it. Who wouldn't? The selling points are (a) this is a family in Los Angeles; (b) the family is enmeshed, has terrible boundaries; and (c) there is no (c). I assumed it would be about transgender issues, a welcome change, no pun intended, and got that right. Had the show lived up to it, and maybe it will in the future, I would have raved. The transgendered people I see in my practice hurt from our cultural lack of understanding, and they have the same needs and wants as everyone else. Feeling accepted is an impossible dream in "ordinary" social circles. And it is very hard, seriously, to be a woman trapped in a man's body, wanting to shop, wanting to talk girl talk ...

On Love and Power (the previous post) there's a great comment and I think it deserves a decent answer. Mound Builder February 5, 2014 at 4:44 PM I know that you've written this post in terms of committed, intimate relationships but to me, much of this also applies in work relationships, too, and probably in other settings as well. Though I do understand that in a work setting there is someone who is ultimately accountable and may have a final say (the boss), there are ways that I think even in a work setting a person should be sharing power. I think an individual who is working should have some capacity for self-determination and should, therefore, be able to share power. In theory.  You wrote the following, "Interestingly, Gottman found that when women expressed anger they could influence their partners, and this predicted happiness in the future. Perhaps it is the only way they are heard in these cases." and what strikes me about this is that I know when I make clea...

I shlepped the February issue of  Psychology Today to Miami in January (we can discuss that trip another time), which is why the pics here are so crumpled. The Love and Power article will get you CEU's, that's how relevant it is. There's always something interesting inside, a summation of research, and this time it is about power. Feminists have known all along that having too much can dilute intimacy. Shared power is the ticket to happy and satisfying intimate relationships, and heterosexual couples tend to err on the side of poor distribution. Control, not power, has been the focus in the archives on intimacy, but power is really a better word. Control implies that the power distribution is intentionally lop-sided. When it comes to power, the latest studies confirm, women yield control far too easily and their partners don't even want them to, necessarily. Then, powerless, no surprise, not having it makes us feel badly, affects the intimacy of our relationship,and n...

(1) Curtis Reeves and the Popcorn Shooting Curtis Reeves Many of us have been known to throw popcorn. It could be that Chad Oulson , out with his wife at the movies in sunny Wesley Chapel, Florida, after texting the babysitter, really did throw popcorn at an irate 71-year-old retired police officer. The retired cop,  Curtis Reeves , shot and killed him. The two men had an altercation about noise in the theater and the illegality of texting just moments before Lone Survivor  was about to begin. Lone Survivor is a film about the Navy Seals. Shots rang out. Violence in vivo. The victim happened to be a former U.S. Naval officer who served his country from 1990 to 1997. The perpetrator, a retired captain of the police. Two veteran officers facing off, only one carrying a .380 automatic pistol. Blood gushing from his mouth,Oulson cried, "I can't believe I got shot!" Incredible. It could have been a mint or a peanut butter cup, just a theory, not popcorn, because Richard...

Before we begin: Are the ads on this blog getting in the way?  I had to ask. Anything I shop for on Amazon automatically is advertised here! And what about this Dynamic Views Blogger format? Yes? No? Who cares?  It's been awhile since we had any snapshots. (1) The Cold and Saving Lives Chicago Cross-country skiing The wise among us, I am told, will not leave home today. That's how cold it is.Nobody's flying to Florida; the planes are grounded. Subzero temps cut a wide swath and it is dangerous, moving about out there. I was at a birthday dinner last night for a couple of really small but well-padded toddlers, and it was all anyone could talk about, think about, worry about, surviving the deep freeze on its way. I can't help but text my daughter (I am a Jewish mother, after all): Please tell me you aren't driving downtown tomorrow to work . She quips back: No, gonna WFH. The salt is getting annoying This makes me happy. Then again, only a day or two ago, at three de...

Well, to end the year with referrals (it is always nice to refer to others), inspired by another blogger's online research, you're getting a link-full of articles and information some about changes in provisions to mental health care  in only the past two weeks, but mostly a dozen or so blogger thoughts, old and new. We probably need to keep up with the new ones, refresh the old. There are links to social work and psychology sites, nonprofit and private practice sites. So if you have some time, maybe while thinking up those New Year resolutions, cruise my new best friend Dorlee's suggestions. They might make good reading. Or make you angry. That depends, as always, upon your politics, for some of these bloggers have strong opinions. One, for example, takes issues with the new DSM, a fairly long read, caveat emptor. Happy New Year, drive safe or preferably not at all, and as you obviously already know, it really isn't cool anymore to drink excessively on New Years Eve. t...