Healthcanc

New from Harper-Collins (1)  My Glory Was I Had Such Friends  is a memoir, the story of a lawyer who needs a heart transplant at the tender, life-affirming age of 25. We tune in at 50 when she needs another. The first donor heart is failing quickly, symptoms painfully communicating that she is in trouble. Amy Silverstein's My Glory I Had Such Friends -- glorious The disease turns unbearable, and she has endured a great deal. This is an emotionally strong woman, but we all have our limits. Pain medication can kill her, slow her heart to a stop. She is going it alone, white knuckling pain. Not easy reading. But it is chick lit, and we love any book with the word "friends" in the title. And Amy has friends, many of them, amazing women who will leave their daily lives to travel across the country, tend to her when she needs them the most. How in the world does this happen? How are some people so blessed, or so lucky? Once I asked a man why he married his wife. He told me tha...

A friend of mine was telling me over a piece of Torah (This could be anything learned from the Jewish holy books, from the most complex argument, to a simple story.) He added that on the day he learned it, he also came across the same lesson from a different source. And then it happened again, the very next day, same lesson, while reading something secular.   Cool, right?  We both said it at the same time. But a part of me thought, Or   random . What my friend is referring to is  Torat Emet , a sign, repeated pointers, to the truth of the lesson. The emet . It is a spiritual thing that manifests in the real world. Knowing this, while reading Kristen Ulmer 's book, The Art of Fear  I had a similar experience. Otherwise it would be easy to dismiss this bio-self-help book, like my professional self insisted. Because Ms Ulmer isn't a mental health professional, and she cites no research or empirical validation of her methods. The Art of Fear  is about the ...

I asked FD, one morning, having been chased inside by mosquitoes the night before, "Why is it that mosquitoes come out at night, and they're gone in the morning?" He thought about it for a minute and said, "You know, they have lives too. And I didn't see that coming.  Just wanted to start with a joke, even if it has nothing to do with the rest of this. Some of us are wanna be stand up comics at heart. Except, that would be so vulnerable-making. Here we go.  It has probably happened to you, that moment of unparalleled embarrassment and emotional powerlessness. It comes out of nowhere, but definitely, somewhere. You are speaking with an acquaintance or a coworker, maybe, or especially an old friend. And she asks about a touchy subject, a topic that tends to be upsetting, and this unexpectedly renders you defenseless. You want to cry, escape. It is a hot button. You're aware that the subject hurt, but until this moment, not entirely how much. It might be an inno...

I didn't really have to go to school all those years, we're finding. So much self-help out there, catchy titles and awesome covers to grab our attention, and much of it is surprisingly, helpful. If only to talk about it, half the time. Still, there's a lot of wisdom to be found at $15.99. In graduate school in the previous century, academia beat us over the head with the notion that what we heard on the radio, watched on television, read about in magazines, newspapers, and self-help books, journalism , is not science, isn't even social science. But that's not the way it is today. Research-based academic journals, think Science ,  Cell ,  Lancet ,  Nature ,  Nature   Genetics ,  Human Relations ,  Journal of Marital and Family Therapy, Family Process ,  American Behavioral Scientist ,  Qualitative Research , and dozens more, are invested in public relations, shoot out press releases to the AP to herald new scientific discoveries, the ones abou...

I know I've been away for awhile, and have so much to say, but all those snapshots about less essential things will have to wait.  Because this is really important.  There is a new show on Netflix , 13 Reasons Why , capturing the attention of teenagers and adults everywhere. When I saw it on the Netflix menu last week I passed without thinking. It seemed so much like work, you know? But it is at the top of my list now. A therapist has to be informed. This is a series of 13 shows focused on 13 people, people who in one way or another contributed to a teen's decision to end her life. Hannah Baker has already done the deed, leaves behind 13 audio cassettes implicating others. The screen adaptation is based on teen fiction writer J ay Ashers'  2007 novel of the same name . Any therapist will tell you that we all, in one way or another, have at some point in our lives, affected the mental health of another person, for better or worse. Indeed, there is a therapy adage, well-u...

Miami Beach, foggy at times " Is there a free airport shuttle to the hotel?" I ask the switchboard operator .  "The Trump National Doral Hotel is only five miles from Miami International Airport. A cab is about $25.00," she laughs, not exactly laughs, but informs, sounding a little like Siri. "Or you can take an Uber for less." "Thanks," I mumble, hanging up. Her implication is obvious. If you can afford to stay at the Trump , you can afford the taxi.  Who stays there? Mostly golfers, just a hunch. And others who are comped by their hosts.  It did seem like a secure place to be, which always feels good, security at the gate, men in sun glasses on the roof, watching the stunning outdoor wedding. The chupah , or wedding canopy, is homemade, borders the greens; guests are in their finery. Rabbis in beards and long black coats bless the ebullient couple. Uninvited hotel guests and staff watch from a balcony above, no different than at any outdoor-at...

It's been coming up in therapy that men need to be babied when they are sick. They think they're dying at the first sign of a headache, a cold, weakness, and if they are married, expect their partners to drop everything to take care of them, nurture them. And all their partner wants to say is:   Man up. It's a cold. That's pretty funny, no? Is it true? Are most men big babies when they're down for the count? Sometimes, surely not universally. We all know men who refuse to stay home from work when they have a cold, even a fever, or who might stay home but won't call their moms to make them chicken soup. They make it themselves, or order in, or do without. Are the less needy ones the same men who second shift, who know that there are other things that have to be done, more important things than lying around to wait for the fever to pass? Maybe. But it is more likely they had to take care of themselves as kids, didn't have a mommy hovering over them when they c...